Just a few days ago I was physically and mentally harassed by a customer at work. It happened in an area which was secluded. After greeting this person I walked away but he approached me and talked to me in a very demeaning way. He then violated my space by making physical contact. I was scared. I felt powerless. And, I thought I allowed it to happen to me.

Everyday we hear stories about women being harassed by men. Like most people, I have always sympathized with them, but could never actually empathize with the victims, until recently.

Women tell themselves, “It won’t happen to me and I know how to handle situations like that.” Well, that is what I thought. Yet, like I found out, it can happen to anyone.

How can women who have been harassed overcome what happened to them? Better yet, how can women avoid being harassed?

Get your fix by reading on…

People seem to think that if they are in a safe environment, nothing will happen to them. I felt safe in my work environment, yet this did not matter when I was eventually harassed by someone I did not know.

“[cases of sexual harrasment] are all traumatic because it shatters the way we think the world works.” said Bobbi Emel of the counseling department of the Skyline College.

People have an image of the world around them, they see things for what they are and think that life will always remain the way they see it. This idea is especially true because people want to believe that they are in a safe environment.

“This can happen in a safe setting.” according to Emel.

When I was being harassed by this person, I did not know what to do. I was at work and I had an image to uphold because I was there as an employee. I was scared to react in a way that people would notice.

I was scared to be embarrassed. I was scared to call someone out for the wrong reasons, and I was scared that I would be fired for not doing my job by helping a customer.

Now, I realized I was scared for the wrong reasons.

Someone consoling me after the incident said, “there is a time you have to separate yourself from what you are suppose to do so that you can protect yourself.”

In the whole scheme of things, I was worried about what people would think, but in the end, all one really should do if put into a situation like this, is worry about getting out of the situation without getting hurt.

When I was being harassed, I felt powerless and trapped. No matter how strong I thought I was as an individual, he had a way of making me feel weak and he used my weaknesses against me.

A part of me knew there was something wrong with this man.

If you ever feel uncomfortable and powerless around a person, especially one you do not know, listen to your instinct and keep a distance away from this person. However, if you are already in the situation, do not be afraid to run and yell for help.

After being harassed by him, I thought that I allowed it to happen to me. I thought it was my fault because I did not do anything to appease the situation.

However in the end, I realized one should never feel guilty for being harassed.

“Make sure you don’t berate yourself or belittle yourself” Emel said, “it is important not to get down on yourself…It happened to you, you didn’t do it.”

What actually helped me get through a situation like this was actually talking about it and sharing my story with others like you, the reader. Do not be afraid to tell someone what happened to you. In fact, if you tell others what happened, it may prevent those people from actually going through the same situation. It is also a good idea to see a psychiatrist or counselor at school. Do not be afraid to speak.

I know I may be the “get your fix” girl, and that does not make me a psychiatrist or a person with a PH.D in social work. However, I am also an ordinary person who never imagined, much more, lived through a moment of harassment prior to this experience.

Now, I am advising you to get your fix and understand the circumstances leading up to harassment. Always keep your guard up and never assume that a person will not attempt to harass you because life takes the oddest turns whether you like it or not.

Places to call and visit(650)877-5494The Victim Center1024 Mission RoadSouth San Francisco, CA 94080

24 hour Hotline: 650-692-RAPE

Tips on dealing with harassment· It’s never okay for someone you do not know to touch you· Harassment can occur in a place that you feel safe· Be aware of your personal boundaries· No matter how mentally prepared you think you are it can still happen· It is good to talk about being harassed even if it is a little thing· Its not your fault· Talk to your counselor or someone you trust if harassed· Take self defense classes