The Night King of Westeros Announces Endorsement of Donald Trump

The Night King of Westeros Announces Endorsement of Donald Trump.

Endorsements for Donald Trump have been rolling in ever since he announced his candidacy for president in June 2015. Names, faces and organizations from nearly every corner of the world have expressed their endorsement for Mr. Trump including former U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney, House Speaker Paul Ryan, Senator Ted Cruz, the National Rifle Association and American mythology incarnate-Chuck Norris.

Yet his latest endorsement may, no pun intended, trump them all.

The Night King, of the island of Westeros, is the leader of an ancient race of humanoid ice creatures known as the White Walkers and has amassed an army of his fellow “walkers” and reanimated human corpses known as “Wights.”

He’s hoping that his strong coalition of zombies and soulless ice creatures will help him as he puts it, “Make Westeros Terrible Again.”

The Night King held a press conference on the grounds of a slaughtered village of wildlings where he was in the process of reanimating corpses and razing the settlement, to explain why he had announced his support for the Republican nominee.

Speaking from his ice podium he coldly explained “I don’t usually get myself involved in politics, too much talk, not enough killing for my taste, but after watching and speaking with Mr. Trump I am hereby announcing my support for his candidacy for president.”

The Night King elaborated on his position by focusing on their similar personalities as ambitious strong men, explaining “You know one of the main reasons I was drawn to Mr. Trump was because of the parallels between us. We’re both narcissistic, chauvinistic, morally bankrupt individuals with an unhealthy thirst for absolute power.

That’s not to say these qualities are hard to find in politicians but Mr. Trump had that extra little bit of depravity that really convinced me that he was “my guy.”

Donald Trump was very thankful for the support and concurred with much of what the Night King said. “I have always been a big fan of the Night King. He’s done a tremendous, tremendous job in Westeros. Truly beautiful, beautiful tremendous things for those people. These white walkers call me all the time and they say “Donald you’d love this guy” and I do, I truly do. I mean the guy has done so many tremendous things for them.”

Trump even went on to explain it might energize his base even further as he said “I mean both of our supporters are either souless or zombies who just agree with whatever we say or do.

The Night King, my dear friend, a tremendous man, even offered a small loan of a million zombies for the election. What a guy huh?! I’ve got tremendous respect for him, I really do, I really do but I had to refuse the offer. Trust me I got enough zombies supporting me” Trump said with a laugh.

When asked how they would resolve their policy differences when it came to walls, Mr. Trump of course wants to build one along the Mexican border while The Night King wants to destroy the one preventing him from reigning terror across Westeros, Mr. Trump offered a simple solution.

“Compromise.”